Sex is a natural aspect of human life, and it is a healthy way to express intimacy with one’s partner. However, for many years, most sexual cultural and social understanding revolved around the pleasure of the male partner. Women’s pleasure was often ignored, and their sexual experiences were significantly affected. Fortunately, as time passes, the notion is unlearnt, and more people are understanding the need for mutual pleasure. The issue of orgasm gap has been a significant challenge in the heteronormative sexual narrative. Women have been attached to the myths surrounding female orgasms and have been bearing this societal burden. Fortunately, Rena Malik, M.D. and Dr. Laurie Mintz, discussed this issue in their recent podcast episode, “A Bigger Penis ≠ More Pleasure” and provided insights into how men can pleasure a woman.
Mindfulness and Communication in Pleasuring a Woman
During the podcast episode, Rena Malik and Dr. Laurie Mintz emphasized the need for the couple to practice mindfulness and communicate effectively. Mindfulness is a mental state in which one is entirely aware of their feelings and thoughts. Through mindfulness, individuals can concentrate and be fully present during sexual experiences. According to Dr. Laurie Mintz, a sexual psychologist, it is crucial for people to have the mind and body in the same place during sex, as mind-wandering prevents people from enjoying sex and having an orgasm. Mindfulness can be practiced through meditation, yoga, or everyday activities. Dr. Laurie Mintz had emphasized the use of mindfulness during sex, citing that “Being mindful during sex is like the brain state of deep mindfulness meditation.” This approach allows one to turn off self-monitoring and be fully present in the moment, which is a prerequisite to orgasm.
Effective communication during sex is also essential in understanding a woman’s pleasure. Partners should have a conversation outside of the bedroom about pleasure and ask for guidance on what their partner needs. During sex, a partner can orally, manually, or through vibrator stimulation, provide a pleasurable sexual experience. Partners must understand the importance of clitoral stimulation, which is vital in most women’s sexual pleasure. Men care about women’s pleasure, but they may be misguided by false information and lack knowledge. This is evident in how common myths about women’s orgasms have persisted over time.
Understanding Female Physiology
Sexual experiences should be pleasurable for both partners. Understanding female anatomy is essential in providing a pleasurable experience. Most people believe that the size of a man’s penis is directly proportional to female sexual pleasure; this is not accurate. Women prioritize feeling connected and clitoral stimulation for sexual pleasure over penis size. A study asked women what is important to them during intercourse, and penis size was not mentioned. The women mentioned the importance of lovers who care about their pleasure, communicate, and understand the importance of the clitoris. Therefore, learning about female pleasure is more beneficial than focusing on penis size.
Read also: 5 Surprising Facts You Need to Know about a Female Body
https://renamalikmd.com/5-surprising-facts-you-need-to-know-about-a-female-body/
Lubrication is an essential aspect of sexual experiences, as adequate vaginal lubrication provides comfort during penetration. The amount of vaginal lubrication during intercourse varies depending on the woman’s comfort level, stress levels, and biology. Some women produce a lot of natural vaginal lubrication, while others don’t. The lack of lubrication doesn’t necessarily mean a lack of arousal. Proper arousal is important in allowing the vagina to self-lubricate and for the cervix to rise, preventing pain during penetration. It is recommended for taking enough time (20-40 minutes) for proper arousal before penetration. Store-bought lubricants can be used to enhance comfort during sexual activity, and there is no harm in using them.
The Vibrator Controversy
People have also wondered whether vibrators or toys can replace a partner in the bedroom. Vibrators are a tool to add to the bedroom experience, and it cannot replace the intimacy and emotional connection provided by a partner. They can provide good stimulation for vulvas and clitorises, as they respond well to vibration. Studies show that a man’s acceptance of his partner’s vibrator use is related to her sexual satisfaction. Using a partner’s vibrator during intercourse can enhance the experience for both parties. Therefore, vibrators are just a tool to add to the experience, not a replacement for intimacy.
Read also: How a vibrator can dramatically boost your sex life
https://renamalikmd.com/how-a-vibrator-can-dramatically-boost-your-sex-life/
Pornography’s Influence on Pleasuring Women
Pornography has both positive and negative effects on sexual experiences. Positives include arousal, mood enhancement, and better communication between couples who watch it together. However, negatives include compulsive use and sexual dysfunction caused by reliance on porn. The significant harm occurs when people use it as education rather than entertainment, leading to false expectations and harmful practices. Porn often depicts anal sex without proper preparation, leading to injury and STIs. The current rise of easily accessible pornographic content demonstrates an increasing threat to sexual consciousness. It affects people’s understanding of proper sexual encounters and therefore leads to bad habits and misunderstandings of what sexual encounters should look like.
Conclusion
Conclusively, sexual experiences should be pleasurable for both partners. Understanding the female anatomy, proper communication, proper arousal, and mindfulness during sex, enhances mutual pleasure. Ignorance of the clitoris has been a significant issue in fulfilling this goal. Men must understand the importance of female anatomy and the clitoris to provide a pleasurable sexual experience. Vibrators should not be a replacement for intimacy, but rather a tool to enhance the experience. Partners must communicate, be mindful, and sensitive to the needs of their partner. Moreover, in educating people about these issues, the world would have an increase in sexual consciousness and improved sexual experiences.
